Don't React, Respond !

Have you heard of the Cockroach Theory for Self Development?

At a restaurant, a cockroach suddenly flew from somewhere and sat on a lady. She started screaming out of fear. With a panic stricken face and trembling voice, she started jumping, with both her hands desperately trying to get rid of the cockroach. Her reaction was contagious, as everyone in her group also got panicky.

The lady finally managed to push the cockroach away but ...it landed on another lady in the group.

Now, it was the turn of the other lady in the group to continue the drama. The waiter rushed forward to their rescue.

In the relay of throwing, the cockroach next fell upon the waiter. The waiter stood firm, composed himself and observed the behavior of the cockroach on his shirt. When he was confident enough, he grabbed it with his fingers and threw it out of the restaurant.

Sipping my coffee and watching the amusement, the antenna of my mind picked up a few thoughts and started wondering, was the cockroach responsible for their histrionic behavior?

If so, then why was the waiter not disturbed?

He handled it near to perfection, without any chaos. It is not the cockroach, but the inability of the ladies to handle the disturbance caused by the cockroach that disturbed the ladies.

I realized that, it is not the shouting of my father or my boss or my wife that disturbs me, but it's my inability to handle the disturbances caused by their shouting that disturbs me. It's not the traffic jams on the road that disturbs me, but my inability to handle the disturbance caused by the traffic jam that disturbs me.

More than the problem, it's my reaction to the problem that creates chaos in my life.

Lessons learnt from the story:

Do not react in life. Always respond. The women reacted, whereas the waiter responded.

Reactions are always instinctive whereas responses are always well thought of, just and right to save a situation from going out of hands, to avoid cracks in relationship, to avoid taking decisions in anger, anxiety, stress or hurry.

Girl with four boyfriends !

Once upon a time there was a girl who had four boyfriends.

She loved the 4th boyfriend the most 'n adored him with rich robes 'n treated him to the finest of delicacies. She gave him nothing but the best.

She also loved the 3rd boyfriend very much 'n was always showing him off to neighboring kingdoms. However, she feared that one day he would leave her for another.

She also loved her 2nd boyfriend. He was her confidant 'n was always kind, considerate 'n patient with her. Whenever this girl faced a problem, she could confide in him, 'n he would help her get through the difficult times.

The girls 1st boyfriend was a very loyal partner 'n had made great contributions in maintaining her wealth 'n kingdom. However, she d id not love the first boyfriend. Although he loved her deeply, she hardly took notice of him!

One day, the girl fell ill 'n she knew her time was short. She thought of her luxurious life 'n wondered, I now have four boyfriends with me, but when I die, I'll be all alone.'

Thus, she asked the 4th boyfriend, 'I loved you the most, endowed you with the finest clothing 'n showered great care over you. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me 'n keep me company?'

'No way!', replied the 4th boyfriend, 'n he walked away without another word..

His answer cut like a sharp knife right into her heart.

The sad girl then asked the 3rd boyfriend, 'I loved you all my life. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me 'n keep me company?'

'No!', replied the 3rd boyfriend. 'Life is too good! When you die, I'm going to marry someone else!'

Her heart sank 'n turned cold.

She then asked the 2nd boyfriend, 'I have always
turned to you for help 'n you've always been there for me.

When I die, will you follow me 'n keep me company?'

'I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time!', replied the 2nd boyfriend. 'At the very most, I can only walk with you to your grave.'

His answer struck her like a bolt of lightning, 'n the girl was devastated.

Then a voice called out: 'I'll go with you. I'll follow you no matter where you go..'

The girl looked up, 'n there was his first boyfriend. He was very skinny as he suffered from malnutrition 'n neglect.

Greatly grieved, the girl said, 'I should have taken much better care of you when I had the chance!'

In truth, you have 4 boyfriends in your lives:

Your 4th boyfriend is your body. No matter how much time 'n effort you lavish in making it look good, it will leave you when you die.

Your 3rd boyfriend is your possessions, status 'n wealth.When you die, it will all go to others.

Your 2nd boyfriend is your family 'n friends. No matter how much they have been there for you, the furthest they can stay by you is up to the grave.

'n your 1st boyfriend is your Soul. Often neglected in pursuit of wealth, power 'n pleasures of the world.

However, your Soul is the only thing that will follow you where ever you go.Cultivate, strengthen 'n cherish it now, for it is the only part of you that will follow you to the throne of God 'n continue with you throughout Eternity.

Remember, when the world pushes you to your knees,you're in the perfect position to pray.

Being happy doesn't mean everything's perfect. It means you've decided to see beyond the imperfections.. !

Top of Form

Bottom of Form

A little boy & his mother !

Make Everyone Happy With Something You Have !

A 9 Year Boy went to an ICE CREAM shop.

Waiter
What do you want.?

Boy
How much a CONE ICE CREAM costs ?

Waiter
Rs.15/-

Then the BOY checked his pocket & asked for cost of small cone ?

Irritated Waiter angrily said
Rs.12/-

Boy ordered a small cone, had it, paid bill & left.

When the waiter came to pick the EMPTY PLATE tears rolled down from his eyes...

The boy had left Rs 3 as Tip for him.

MORAL :

"MAKE EVERYONE HAPPY WITH SOMETHING YOU HAVE"

I made a difference !

Before you complain !

Today before you think of saying an unkind word–

think of someone who can’t speak.

Before you complain about the taste of your food–
think of someone who has nothing to eat.

Before you complain about your husband or wife–
think of someone who is crying out to God for a companion.

Today before you complain about life–
think of someone who went too early to heaven.

Before you complain about your children–
think of someone who desires children but they’re barren.

Before you argue about your dirty house, someone didn’t clean or sweep–
think of the people who are living in the streets.

Before whining about the distance you drive–
think of someone who walks the same distance with their feet.

And when you are tired and complain about your job–
think of the unemployed, the disabled and those who wished they had your job.

But before you think of pointing the finger or condemning another–
remember that not one of us are without sin and we all answer to one maker.

And when depressing thoughts seem to get you down–
put a smile on your face and thank God for what you have.

Remember what life was before !

There was a blind girl who hated herself just because she was blind. 
She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend.

He was always there for her.

She said that if she could only see the world, she would marry her boyfriend...

One day, someone donated a pair of eyes to her and then she could see 

everything, including her boyfriend. 

Her boyfriend asked her, "Now that you can see the world, will you marry 

me?"

The girl was shocked when she saw that her boyfriend was blind too, and

refused to marry him.

Her boyfriend walked away in tears, and later wrote a letter to her saying, 

"Just take care of my eyes dear."  (He had donated his eyes to her.)

This is how the human brain changes when our status changes. Only few remember what life was before, and who's always been there even in the most painful situations.

Confidence....Determination...Persistence !

This is a real life story of engineer John Roebling building the Brooklyn Bridge in New York, USA back in 1870. The bridge was completed in 1883, after 13 years.

In 1883, a creative engineer named John Roebling was inspired by an idea to build a spectacular bridge connecting New York with the Long Island. However bridge building experts throughout the world thought that this was an impossible feat and told Roebling to forget the idea. It just could not be done. It was not practical. It had never been done before.

Roebling could not ignore the vision he had in his mind of this bridge. He thought about it all the time and he knew deep in his heart that it could be done. He just had to share the dream with someone else. After much discussion and persuasion he managed to convince his son Washington, an up and coming engineer, that the bridge in fact could be built.

Working together for the first time, the father and son developed concepts of how it could be accomplished and how the obstacles could be overcome. With great excitement and inspiration, and the headiness of a wild challenge before them, they hired their crew and began to build their dream bridge.

The project started well, but when it was only a few months underway a tragic accident on the site took the life of John Roebling. Washington was also injured and left with a certain amount of brain damage, which resulted in him not being able to talk or walk.

“We told them so.” “Crazy men and their crazy dreams.” “It’s foolish to chase wild visions.”

Everyone had a negative comment to make and felt that the project should be scrapped since the Roeblings were the only ones who knew how the bridge could be built.

In spite of his handicap Washington was never discouraged and still had a burning desire to complete the bridge and his mind was still as sharp as ever. He tried to inspire and pass on his enthusiasm to some of his friends, but they were too daunted by the task.

As he lay on his bed in his hospital room, with the sunlight streaming through the windows, a gentle breeze blew the flimsy white curtains apart and he was able to see the sky and the tops of the trees outside for just a moment.

It seemed that there was a message for him not to give up. Suddenly an idea hit him. All he could do was move one finger and he decided to make the best use of it. By moving this, he slowly developed a code of communication with his wife.

He touched his wife’s arm with that finger, indicating to her that he wanted her to call the engineers again. Then he used the same method of tapping her arm to tell the engineers what to do. It seemed foolish but the project was under way again.

For 13 years Washington tapped out his instructions with his finger on his wife’s arm, until the bridge was finally completed. Today the spectacular Brooklyn Bridge stands in all its glory as a tribute to the triumph of one man’s indomitable spirit and his determination not to be defeated by circumstances. It is also a tribute to the engineers and their team work, and to their faith in a man who was considered mad by half the world. It stands too as a tangible monument to the love and devotion of his wife who for 13 long years patiently decoded the messages of her husband and told the engineers what to do.

Perhaps this is one of the best examples of a never-say-die attitude that overcomes a terrible physical handicap and achieves an impossible goal.

Often when we face obstacles in our day-to-day life, our hurdles seem very small in comparison to what many others have to face. The Brooklyn Bridge shows us that dreams that seem impossible can be realized with determination and persistence, no matter what the odds are.

Faith..Trust...Hope !

Bullying !

Be grateful to people !

Mr. Zavere Poonawala, a well-known Parsee industrialist in Pune had a driver named Ganga Datt with him for 30 years driving his limousine, which was originally owned by Acharya Rajneesh.

Ganga Datt passed away recently and at that time Mr. Poonawala was in Mumbai for some important work. As soon as he heard the news, he canceled all his meetings, requested the driver's family to await him for the cremation and came back to Pune immediately by a helicopter.

On reaching Pune, he asked the limo to be decorated with flowers as he wished Ganga Datt should be taken in the same car which he himself had driven since the beginning. When Ganga Datt's family agreed to his wishes, he himself drove Ganga Datt from his home up to the ghat on his last journey.

When asked about it, Mr. Poonawala replied that Ganga Datt had served him day and night, and he could at least do this being eternally grateful to him. He further added that Ganga Datt rose up from poverty and educated both his children very well. His daughter is a Chartered accountant and that is so commendable.

His comment in the end, is the essence of a successful life in all aspects:

“Everybody earns money which is nothing unusual in that, but we should always be grateful to those people who contribute to our success. This is the belief, we have been brought up with, which made me do, what I did”.

Be the drop !

This is a true story that had happened in 1892 at Stanford University . It’s moral is still relevant today.

A young, 18 year old student was struggling to pay his fees. He was an orphan, and not knowing where to turn for money, he came up with a bright idea. A friend and he decided to host a musical concert on campus to raise money for their education.


They reached out to the great pianist Ignacy J. Paderewski. His manager demanded a guaranteed fee of $2,000 for the piano recital. A deal was struck. And the boys began to work to make the concert a success.


The big day arrived. Paderewski performed at Stanford. But unfortunately, they had not managed to sell enough tickets. The total collection was only $1,600. Disappointed, they went to Paderewski and explained their plight. They gave him the entire $1,600, plus a cheque for the balance of $400. They promised to honour the cheque soonest possible.


“No.” said Paderewski. “This is not acceptable,” he tore up the cheque, returned the $1,600 and told the boys “Here’s the $1,600. Please deduct whatever expenses you have incurred. Keep the money you need for your fees. And just give me whatever is left.” The boys were surprised, and thanked him profusely.


It was a small act of kindness. But it clearly marked out Paderewski as a great human being. Why should he help two people he did not even know? We all come across situations like these in our lives. And most of us only think “If I help them, what would happen to me?”


The truly great people think, “If I don’t help them, what will happen to them?” They don’t do it expecting something in return. They do it because they feel it’s the right thing to do.


Paderewski later went on to become the Prime Minister of Poland. He was a great leader, but unfortunately when the World War began, Poland was ravaged. There were over 1.5 million people starving in his country, and no money to feed them.


Paderewski did not know where to turn for help. He reached out to the US Food and Relief Administration for help.


The head was a man called Herbert Hoover – who later went on to become the US President. Hoover agreed to help and quickly shipped tons of food grains to feed the starving Polish people. A calamity was averted.


Paderewski was relieved. He decided to go across to meet Hoover and personally thank him. When Paderewski began to thank Hoover for his noble gesture, Hoover quickly interjected and said, “You shouldn’t be thanking me, Mr. Prime Minister. You may not remember this, but several years ago, you helped two young students go through college in the US . I was one of them.”


The world is a wonderful place. What goes around usually comes around.
Author Unknown

Stay Positive !

Thomas Edison tried two thousand different materials in search of a filament for the light bulb. When none worked satisfactorily, his assistant complained, "All our work is in vain. We have learned nothing."

Edison replied very confidently, "Oh, we have come a long way and we have learned a lot. We now that there are two thousand elements which we cannot use to make a good light bulb."

Forget the past & move on !

Trust in God !

A man just got married and was returning home with his wife.They were crossing a lake in a boat, when suddenly a great storm arose.

The man was a warrior, but the woman became very much afraid because it seemed almost hopeless:

The boat was small and the storm was really huge, and any moment they were going to be drowned. But the man sat silently, calm and quiet, as if nothing was happening.

The woman was trembling and she said, “Are you not afraid ?”.

This may be our last moment of life! It doesn’t seem that we will be able to reach the other shore. Only some miracle can save us; otherwise death is certain.

Are you not afraid? Are you mad or something? Are you a stone or something?

The man laughed and took the sword out of its sheath.

The woman was even more puzzled:

What he was doing?

Then he brought the naked sword close to the woman’s neck, so close that just a small gap was there, it was almost touching her neck.

He said,” Are you afraid ?”

She started to laugh and said,” Why should I be afraid ?,If the sword is in your hands, why I should be afraid?

I know you love me.

” He put the sword back and said, This is my answer”.

I know God Loves me, and the storm is in His hands

SO WHATSOEVER IS GOING TO HAPPEN IS GOING TO BE GOOD.

If we survive, good; if we don’t survive, good ,because everything is in His hands and He cannot do anything wrong.

THIS IS THE TRUST ONE NEEDS TO IMBIBE. Such tremendous trust is capable
of transforming your whole life -- less than that won't do.

“Good, Bad, Who Knows?”

Ajahn Brahm, one of the most famous Buddhist teachers in the world, explains things using stories. This is a story to illustrate bad things that happened in our lives can be a blessing in disguise. Be Positive.

The story is called “Good, Bad, Who Knows?”

In old India, there lived a King who loves hunting. One day, he went hunting with his great Doctor. While hunting, the King was pricked by a strange plant on his middle finger. The finger became swollen and painful. The doctor applied a special ointment to the wound and bandage the King's finger.

The King then asked, "Will my finger be alright?"

The Doctor answered, "Good ? Bad ? Who knows ?"

A few days passed and the King's finger became worse. He summoned the doctor and asked, "Will my finger be alright?"

The Doctor answered, "Good ? Bad ? Who knows ?"

A few days later, the King's finger was badly infected and has to be amputated from his hand. The King was furious and ordered the doctor to be jailed and hang in a month's time.

Meanwhile, after a week's of recovery, the King went hunting again. This time he was more unfortunate. He was captured by a cannibal tribe. Before the tribe can burn him as a human sacrifice, the priest noticed he had only nine fingers. It was the tribe's believe that only a person with a full and perfect body can be used as a sacrifice. So they released the King.

Back to the Kingdom, the King immediately ordered the release of the doctor. The doctor was summoned to the King. The King said: "Great doctor, because of you, I lost my finger but in turn, it saves my life."

The Doctor said, "Good ? Bad ? I know. Great King, if not because of you putting me in jail and thus I cannot go hunting with you. If not, I would have been captured by the tribe and used as the sacrifice. Thank you, you save my life !"

So...Good ? Bad ? Who Knows ?. According to Ajahn Brahm, the tragedy itself is an opportunity that teaches us to become kinder and wiser. Unpleasant things happen in life and they happen to everyone. The only difference between a happy person and one who gets depressed is how they respond to disasters.

Making others happy !

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room's only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. 

The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation. 

Every afternoon when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window. The man in the other bed began to live for those one-hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside. 

The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young couples walking amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance. 

As the man by the window described all this in exquisite detail, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene. 

One warm afternoon the man by the window described a parade passing by. Although the other man couldn't hear the band - he could see it. In his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words. 

Days and weeks passed. One morning, the nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away. 

As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone. 

Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside. He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed. It faced a blank wall. 

The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window. The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall. She said, "Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you." 

There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations.

Best Friends !

One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school. His name was Kyle. It looked like he was carrying all of his books. I thought to myself, "Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd."

I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on. As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him. He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes. My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him and as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye. As I handed him his glasses, I said, "Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives." He looked at me and said, "Hey thanks!" There was a big smile on his face. It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.

I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived. As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private school before now. I would have never hung out with a private school kid before. We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books. He turned out to be a pretty cool kid. I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends. He said yes.

We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him. Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again. I stopped him and said, "Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!" He just laughed and handed me half the books.

Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends. When we were seniors, we began to think about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown, and I was going to Duke. I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem. He was going to be a doctor, and I was going for business on a football scholarship.

Kyle was valedictorian of our class. I teased him all the time about being a nerd. He had to prepare a speech for graduation. I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak. Graduation day, I saw Kyle. He looked great. He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses. He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him. Boy, sometimes I was jealous. Today was one of those days. I could see that he was nervous about his speech. So, I smacked him on the back and said, "Hey, big guy, you'll be great!" He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled. "Thanks," he said.

As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began. "Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but mostly your friends... I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story." I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met.

He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home. He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile. "Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable.." I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment. I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile. Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.

Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you can change a person's life. For better or for worse. God puts us all in each other's lives to impact one another in some way. Look for God in others.

"Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly."

- Author Unknown

Today is a beautiful day !

A blind boy sat on the steps of a building with a hat by his feet. He held up a sign which said: ‘ I am blind, please help.’ There were only a few coins in the hat. A man was walking by. He took a few coins from his pocket and dropped them into the hat. He then took the sign, turned it around, and wrote some words. He put the sign back so that everyone who walked by would see the new words.

Soon the hat began to fill up. A lot more people were giving money to the blind boy. That afternoon the man who had changed the sign came to see how things were. The boy recognized his footsteps and asked, ‘Were you the one who changed my sign this morning? What did you write?’ The man said, ‘I only wrote the truth. I said what you said but in a different way.’ What he had written was: ‘ Today is a beautiful day and I cannot see it. ‘

Do you think the first sign and the second sign were saying the same thing?

Of course both signs told people the boy was blind. But the first sign simply said the boy was blind. The second sign told people they were so blessed that they were not blind and can see beautiful things. Should we be surprised that the second sign was more effective?

Be thankful for what you have. Be creative & innovative.Think differently & positively.Handle your present with confidence.Keep the faith & drop the fear.

The most beautiful thing is to see a person smiling. And even more beautiful, is knowing that you are the reason behind it!!!

Put the glass down !

The Professor began his class by holding up a glass with some water in it. He held it up for all to see & asked the students “How much do you think this glass weighs?”

’50gms!’….. ’100gms!’ …..’125 gms’ …the students answered.
“I really don’t know unless I weigh it,” said the professor, “but, my question is:
What would happen if I held it up like this for a few minutes?”
‘Nothing’ …..the students said.
‘Ok what would happen if I held it up like this for an hour?’ the professor asked.
‘Your arm would begin to ache’ said one of the student
“You’re right, now what would happen if I held it for a day?”
“Your arm could go numb; you might have severe muscle stress & paralysis & have to go to hospital for sure!”
….. Ventured another student & all the students laughed
“Very good. But during all this, did the weight of the glass change?” Asked the professor.
‘No’…. Was the answer.
“Then what caused the arm ache & the muscle stress?”
The students were puzzled.
“What should I do now to come out of pain?” asked professor again.
“Put the glass down!” said one of the students
“Exactly!” said the professor.
Life’s problems are something like this.
Hold it for a few minutes in your head & they seem OK.
Think of them for a long time & they begin to ache.
Hold it even longer & they begin to paralyze you. You will not be able to do anything.
It’s important to think of the challenges or problems in your life, But EVEN MORE IMPORTANT is to ‘PUT THEM DOWN’ at the end of every day before you go to sleep…
That way, you are not stressed, you wake up every day fresh &strong & can handle any issue, any challenge that comes your way!

So, when you start your day today, Remember  to ‘PUT THE GLASS DOWN TODAY!